Tilly, Derek, Conor & Jack´s World Tour!

It started out as a fun night out with friends in one of the most beautiful places on earth...

Drinks over looking the sandy beach...
A live band entertaining the crowd...
Dancing the night away...

But Jack, Derek & Vicky were about to experience a horrifying attack!

The taxi they were in had just pulled up to the the pedestrian bridge which linked the hostel to the sleepy town of Barra Lagoa. But as Jack, Derek & Vicky crossed over, little did they know that a masked assailant was plotting his attack. The threesome made it over the bridge and were starting the hike up the small narrow lane to the hostel when they heard all almighty roar from behind them.

Running towards them was a local masked Brazilian holding a 12 inch knife. He shouted at the stunned travellers who had not a word of Portuguese between them, but they knew exactly what he wanted and what he was willing to do to get it.

Derek tryed to call his bluff and told him to F-off but a quick lunge by the attacker put Derek in his place. Vicky then started to drop her money as she handed it over which bought her a couple of yards while backing off towards the hostel door. Jack handed over his measly R$2 (60c) to know amusement, but it was all he had after the nights drinking. After collecting nearly R$60 the knife man was still not satisfied and now had the 3 backpackers cornered by the locked hostel door. With the night porter fast asleep Jack negotiated with the attacker in pigeon Portuguese. His only bargaining chip was the possibility of more money once we got in to the hostel or the stray dogs that were at his feet.... needless to say the dogs did not interest the mugger.

Finally the door was buzzed open so that Vicky & Derek could enter the hostel, but by some turn of strange events Jack had entered a Michael Jackson "Beat it" style knife fight. The strung out mugger held his knife in one hand and had Jack's hand in the other, while Jacks other hand gripped the mental bars of the hostel gate.

We had entered a good old fashioned stand off with Derek just inside the hostel and Jack at the door avoiding the swinging knife of the attacker. Derek shouted in to the sleeping hostel "a little help here please" to no avail. By this point Jack & Derek knew that justice had to be taken in to their own hands. Jack had calmed the situation down as the attacker thought that money was on its way. Then by a simple nod of heads and the utterance of "ag rith" the courageous duo knew exactly what they'd do.

Jack waited for the mugger to lose his patience and make another swipe at him. Then, with his left hand on the bars of the bar he jumped back and swung the metal door at the attacker. The door bashed off the attackers arm and with Vicky safely upstairs the lads ran to the door of their room. They watched as the scumbag slowly entered the lobby. Fearing that Vicky might still not be in her room yet Jack & Derek got the attackers attention. Without a seconds thought, the drugged up local ran at the lads again with the big blunt knife flailing in the air. The lads jumped inside their dorm, waking everyone up in the process. The other travellers thought the lads were joking but soon realised the awful truth as Jack struggled to keep the lock less door closed as the attacker smash against it relentlessly.

Then a deathly silence well upon the hostel. The banging had stopped, but no one knew if the danger had gone. Derek & Jack then slowly opened the door and peered around the lobby only to see other inquisitive residents wondering around. After a quick explanation all those who were awoken, started to search the hostel with weapons in hand in case the fecker was still inside.

Derek went to the balcony with the Ozzies to warn the rest of the arriving party goers who were crossing the bridge. Jack went to check on the other residents in the dorm who were still in shock. Thankfully, everyone else that arrived back to the hostel that night, did so safely and without incident.

From that day on Jack & Derek knew that Barra Lagoa would never be the same. Some say that people used to walk tall in this town, but not anymore... not any more.

Oi! ("hey" in portuguese)

Don't forget to hit the subscribe button to the right to keep up-2-date with our updates.

We set off from Guarapari on a leito bus (luxury) after our final couple of drinks with Derek's uncle. Our next destination was the 3rd biggest city in the world Sao Paulo. There were a lot of men just sitting around in Sao Paulo, on street curbs, little walls, church steps... they are just mad for a good old sit. We explored Japan town and saw some guys haggling with hookers in the street, this was at about midday by the way. We got some food as we watched some Brazilian builders stand around a hole in the street doing nothing for about an hour, just like at home. Then we joined the lads on the church steps for a wee sit, apart from the smell piss it was actually quite nice.

We got another over night bus to Florianopolis, a beautiful bridged island full of travellers, surfers and the alike. BTW we even got to see a "Robbs Sunday Night Movie" on the bus, it was some western, long and drawn out. We met some ozzie guys there, one of which, Luke, put a local kid in a freezer. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but in retrospect it wasn´t (the kid was asking for it). Another of the guys, Rob, had a torch that could tell the time, wow. The final member of the ozzie trio was John, who got sick all over our taxi during that night out. We met this Sligo guy called mick who should us photos of his slightly more hardcore visit to the favellas. He had pics of himself at one of the gangs execution points holding an assortment of semi automatic machine guns.

We got another game of footy going on the beach with a couple of guys who used to come to Ireland to teach in the samba football schools. They also helped us play volleyball with a couple of Brazilian girls, there was a lot of flirty fun and frolicking.

We met a guy called Jacko in the hostel. He was from London, supported Ipswich and lived in San Francisco... he was a legend and he's probably our favourite person so far. He was also pretty handy at the old football and was a master of shitty card games while drinking. He is definitely the best person we've met so far... he´s even too cool for facebook! (or maybe too old). He had great stories about bananas in Amsterdam, the price of abortions in Brazil and Ipswich Town footballing legends! and he wasn't in the least bit smug about it.

Tilly drank the most in the hostel the next night, so he was rewarded with a few free Caprinhas, so he drank himself stupid and fell asleep in the common room. Needless to say, when he woke up we was covered in marker, 3 day lipstick and had all his nails painted (hands & toes). The English lads wrote loads of anti-Liverpool stuff on his arms, like "I love David Moyes"... but Tilly kinda likes Moyes, so he didn't mind.

Derek is now seriously concerned about where we'll watch the Eurovision. It was kinda raining today so Conor watched 7 movies in the hostel, 2 of which were Die Hard 4. We did a spot of sand-boarding which was very exhausting as there are no lifts in the sand dunes, but Tilly definitely thinks there a market for this in Tramore. We watched Walking Tall (starring The Rock) it was awful, but surprisingly based on a true story. Tilly and Jack went surfing again and totally forgot that Tilly was covered in lipstick & marker... its kinda hard to imagine him without it now.

Quotes
"These hats are class!" - Tilly upon finding his free pillow on the bus and putting it straight on his head

"This will be the Mount Everest of hacks" - Tom Cruise

"Ian you are a funny" - Marcello commenting on Tilly's over the top volleyball attempts

"She stands on my nose, makes me think of my clothes" - Jack getting the lyrics to Colbie Caillat song very wrong

"I'd be quite interested in history" - Conor surprises us in Sao Paulo

"Who owns those knickers you're wearing?" - Jack, finding drunk Tilly wondering around with a pair of girls knickers over his pants. Tilly's reply "They're communal knickers"

"I'm not sleazy, I just like chatting to a lot of girls" - Conor tippin' away in the hostel

Awesome bicycle kick count (competitive action only):
Conor - 1
Derek - 0
Jack - 2
Ian - 3

Will Young System
1